During the quarantine era of the pandemic, the use of online dating apps skyrocketed. Desperate for a way to connect with one another in such a lonely time, many people turned to their phones to create these connections. However, how true can a connection really be when it’s cultivated in a space that is based solely on looks?
Dating apps are soul-sucking. When we use these apps, we make dating into more of a game than it has already become. You reduce a complex, multifaceted human being to just a couple of pictures. It’s an egotistical and shallow way to meet people. Basing whether or not someone is deserving of your time and affection on whether or not they are attractive enough is incredibly problematic.
Let’s be honest, no one is going on dating apps to meet their soulmate. It is primarily used as a momentary ego booster. It’s hard to beat that feeling you get when you see someone swiped right on your picture. That instant gratification you get from seeing that you matched with someone is addicting.
Though there are some people who have formed long-term relationships through dating apps, it is incredibly rare and uncommon. Many connections formed on these types of apps are fleeting. The most common narrative is that in which you text someone for a while, go on a mediocre date or two, then get ghosted.
When you are getting to know someone through a screen, it makes it hard for some to see them as real people. It creates a sort of disconnect from them and a lack of consideration for their emotions. This can lead to several toxic behaviors, such as leading someone on, ghosting and just flat out wasting people’s time. I know several people who have admitted to having no intention of ever meeting anyone in person from a dating app and just using it to flirt and get that instant gratification of knowing people think you’re attractive.
The chronic use of these apps has created a lack of real-life human connection. We are losing the ability to connect with one another in a meaningful way. When we rely on using technology to meet people, we lose out on one of the most special things about being alive- real human connection.
People are all around. There are countless new connections waiting for you every day out there in the world. You don’t need an app to help you meet people. All it takes is a little confidence to start a conversation with someone. Delete the apps and go shoot your shot with that cutie in the coffee shop instead. I promise you won’t regret it.
