If you desire lasting and fulfilling relationships, consider the following. You are a young student on a vibrant college campus with tens of thousands of potential love interests.
Each day, as you walk the campus, you sail in a vast ocean of possible partners–and you don’t say a word. You aren’t blind, though.
Since you frequent the same spaces on campus throughout the semester, you see someone who regularly catches your eye. Fancy that you walk over to them and say, “Hi, my name is…What’s your name?”
What would that person think? You don’t get the satisfaction of knowing until you go over and speak to them. Kind of cool, no?
If they respond–and there’s a pretty strong chance they will–you will have just solved the first challenge in the game of relationship building: Establishing communication.
There can be no relationship if no one takes the first step . One of the keys to a long term friendship is regular dialogue.
In giving the gift of our undivided presence to others, we honor our desire for meaningful, lasting connections.
While relation dynamics differ between romantic, familial, and platonic connections, the essential principle remains: our bonds grow in continued, unattached and watchful presence.
In simple terms, dialogue and facetime with one another are what matter.
The time we intentionally spend with others provides us with opportunities to develop healthy relations.
In romance, the idea is to naturally and casually exchange words with someone over a while; allow a one-to-one connection to assemble and strengthen with a person in a relaxed way.
Imagine being a co-creator in an ongoing dialogue that naturally evolves in nuance, complexity and intrigue. In this way, couples establish rapport and trust .
Romantic relationships present a unique set of puzzles because we often too quickly become infatuated by and intimate with others.
The longer you can extend a period of courtship, the easier time you’ll have negotiating and resolving these puzzles. This courtship is how you lay stronger foundations for your relationships.
If you are already intimate with your partner, you can resurrect your courtship period at any time by abstaining from deep physical intimacy for a defined period.
Spend time together and find your common ground. Then consider resuming intimacy. Your chief aim should be to develop the kind of bond which surpasses ephemeral and emotional whims responsible for failed relationships.
No matter your ties to someone, if the freedom and space to communicate are present and you consciously spend one-on-one time with this person, your odds of having a successful relationship will improve.