The experience of death and tragedy transcends age, class, gender and life experience. Grief can severely affect schoolwork and relationships at university.
Budding campus organization Actively Moving Forward dedicates their efforts to helping Georgia State students work through grief.
Vice president Nooruddin Dhanani, a junior psychology major and a research assistant in Georgia State’s clinical neuro-psychology lab, explained that the hardest part about handling grief is finding a balance with the other things in life.
“A college student has to endure their hectic schedule such as jobs, family responsibilities, exams and other extra curricular activities,” Dhanini said. “You feel overwhelmed with everything moving so fast around you; you have other things to tend to and you need an outlet to continue your life healthily.”
The students of AMF meet twice a month for a peer-led discussion. Their goal is to offer an outlet for students who are experiencing a serious illness or the death of a loved one.
Usually prompted by a video or quote about the process of grief, members are encouraged to share their perspectives and, if they wish, offer a personal memory or anecdote of their experience.
AMF helps students confront intimate emotions and personal issues, so the things that are shared during the meetings are strictly confidential.
There are AMF chapters in universities across the nation, and they participate in a variety of charity events like Relay for Life or Bone Marrow Drive.
Dealing with death and grieving is a taboo subject to deal with in the public. Dhanani said it is essential to talk to someone like a counselor about overcoming depression. Additionally, there is a free 13-week program called GriefShare that explores the grieving process and helps students cope.
Repressed suffering can manifest as anger and frustration at yourself and life. Dhanini explained that grieving can often cause isolation from the most important things in life: friends, family and goals.
“Grief causes an overwhelming amount of emotion and the hardest part is coming to school and having to mask those emotions because society frowns upon grief,” Dhanini said.
“We’re told to keep our heads up and move on, and not only is that completely detrimental to the bereavement process, but it minimizes the death of the loved one. There’s a stigma in our society on sharing emotions; it’s viewed as a weakness.”
AMF hopes to reach out to people who would never think such a place would be helpful to them due to these types of misconceptions.
In January 2013, senior Tess Havash founded Georgia State’s AMF chapter. She discovered the organization from a friend at University of Georgia.
When Havash’s dad died when she was seven years old but she never had a chance to talk about it. She denied her emotions until college.
“I was really ashamed of being a griever,” Havash said. “On a campus as big as ours, it’s hard to connect with people about something so intimate. You can’t go up to someone in class or in the courtyard and unleash the mountain of emotions that you’ve been carrying all day. It’s incredibly isolating.”
Self destructive behavior can come from a lack of expression when dealing with death. AMF encourages students to embrace and work through grief rather than repressing it.
“Death is not the opposite of life, but a part of it.”
― Haruki Murakami (graphic potentially)
